Happy Birthday to my Mommy! She is adorable! She didn't think so. She said she always thought this was a goofy picture. She told me she hadn't learned to drive yet - she got in the car - and pretended to drive. I told her - you were playful - it's sweet - it's a beautiful picture. My mom never thought she was beautiful. She still is! She turns 83 today.
I did a podcast this morning.
Lots of thoughts are stirring up - surprisingly positive. I don't want to get too melancholy about my mom aging. Sure it gets a scary at times - wondering when her last day will be, how I will handle it, and how much I will miss her. But then I think - stop it. How does that maudlin, sad, overthinking help me? It doesn't. She's here now. She's 83! That's awesome!
There is something to enjoy your days, your family, your time here, because we don't have a crystal ball and aren't able to "put in our order" way of thinking. But wait! Maybe we can put in our order. Maybe the order is - live. Live, live, live. Live it all. Love to live.
My father passed away when I was very young. I still miss him. It sucked. But you know what? He lived. He was here. He had his time. I need to survive here - and I know my brain goes to dark places when I feel like I can't control anything. I've learned to accept it - however - not to dwell on it so much. I've learned it's okay to just be here. We don't have to tackle everything. We don't have to do it all. We are here. We are here to live, learn and love. I think it can be that simple.
As I've been writing in my "I Gotta Be" me theme - that means my view on life. Everyone needs their compass, their inner road map, and their inner survival guide book to get through this thing called life. We all have different ways of looking at it. It's all good. I think the goal is to find what fits - what fits so well so you can find love and enjoyment here - and peace of mind.
Happy Birthday Mama! You've taught me a lot, you've loved and supported me, you've been there with me through thick and thin, and you are beautiful in and out.