I have discovered it's really important for me to continue to empower myself. Not over power others. I'm not talking about having control over EVERY situation. I'm talking about having control over me in every situation including my thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
Let's see if I can explain a little better.
I'm very sensitive. I over think. I feel a lot. I care. I think of all perspectives. I tend to worry. Sometimes over worry. All right, who am I kidding? I do worry a lot. But I'm practicing every day - to empower myself to get through......well...ME.
There's a little girl in me who wants everyone to be nice. She wants everyone to like each other. She wants everyone to like her. She doesn't want to feel mad, sad, or anxious. She doesn't want other people to be mad, sad or anxious. But guess what? I can't control all of that. I can try and work on my stuff. And that's what I do. Every day.
Okay - just now as I was writing this blog I pushed a button. I don't know what I pushed. But it changed the screen. I thought I lost my writing. I felt myself getting instantly enraged, teeth were gritting, shoulders tight. I could hear Mental Girl saying - "come on - you don't know its lost yet. Hold on. There might be a way. And if you've lost your work - it's OK. Relax the shoulders. Relax your jaw. Relax your mind." I looked up and there was a way. But I wouldn't have seen it if I stayed all balled up angry and tense. Thank you Mental Girl.
In most situations - I would even say ALL situations - there is a way to deal with it. There is a way to give myself self love and self care in every moment so I can see clearly, respond with clarity and calm and creativity. Do I do it all the time? Eventually. But sometimes it takes me a little time to remember I have to do the work. I have control over me. Not that, not him, not her, not over there or there. But inside me.
So I'm taking a deep breath right now. Would you like to take one with me?
I know this work isn't always easy. Just the idea or the word - that it IS work - can be daunting or feel overwhelming. But I promise you (Mental Girl promises me) this work heals. It makes things better in my mind, body and soul. I have found I get, most times, instant gratification from doing the healing work. Sure, sometimes I don't see it right way. But that's OK too. I've done this enough times now, and I see the process - so that when it does take longer - I now have experience and proof that the "good stuff" coming my way is in fact coming. And it's coming for you too.
I took some pictures yesterday for a Twitter friend. He was feeling a little gloomy and depressed because of the weather he was experiencing. What was really cool was he wanted pictures of the sun from other Twittters. He wasn't going to get jealous that others had sun around them. He just wanted to see it. That's a beautiful thing. So I took these pictures and sent some "light and sun" his way.
No matter what - give yourself some light and sun. That light and sun is self care and self love. No matter what kind of light and love you give yourself - believe you deserve it - and give yourself a full dose (and several more if needed) of self love and self care.
Thank you for being here.
Thank you for listening to my podcasts.
I do appreciate you.