I feel setting boundaries is important, and the boundaries you set are important to protect. Not walls. Not heavy armor. But good strong respectful boundaries for myself. This is a hard step for me. I always figured, don't rock the boat, don't make people mad, be nice and then get away. But what have I done to myself? I'm a nervous angry wreck. People walk away thinking they can walk all over me. They figure - she's not complaining - I can continue with this behavior. It's not good. I, frankly, have had enough.
I've been working on this - and it's NOT easy. So I'm not suggesting I had some AHA moment and now I'm a walking ball of confidence. I think you can tell from my podcasts, my posts and this blog - I'm a work in a progress. But guess what? As I sit up straight. Sure you can't see me. But I know. I'm sitting up straight and proud because I'm aware there is work to be done. I deserve this self love step. This will require awareness, practice, a lot of compassion and understanding that I may not get it every time. But now that I'm aware how important this step is - I'm willing to go through the twists and turns. Hey, like the corn maze!
Here is today's podcast:
I was late getting up today. But that's ok. Wow - the warm bed felt good.
Okay - so I did go to the market today. I got a lot of goodies. It's Fall and there is pumpkin biscotti - and it's fabulous. As I was being rung up, by a cashier I've chatted up with before, he made a "joke" about all the "midnight snacks" I was purchasing. I was a little annoyed. Now looking back - I wish I could have used humor - and said "Just ring em up pal - I don't need the commentary." But seriously? I didn't want to commit. I did find myself getting a little defensive - just for a minute. But to be honest - I was more involved in bagging my groceries and getting the heck out of there. But see? There will be opportunities all day long to set those boundaries. That could have been one. Again - being observant about where I am, how I'm feeling, what I'm thinking - that is a HUGE part of the self awareness and mindful work I'm doing. I'm still on the chapter in my book about just being aware of where you are - RIGHT NOW. And when my mind wanders - wants to be somewhere else - or hurry the task - or is judging my every move I can take the opportunity and just observe and give my mind a little nudge - "Hey - let's stay here, shall we? Okay - next time - you'll work on your boundary issue. But hey, you saw it this time."
Setting boundaries with people is risky. I really don't know how they will react. But their reaction to my setting respectful boundaries for myself - is none of my concern. That's on them. That's their work. Not mine. I do ME.
All right - I'm going to look through my pictures and post some cool stuff in the Clickity Clak section. You protect those boundaries, okay? We can do this!