Every day. I'm at it every day. Yep, there are times it seems like the anxiety is a little bit strong and loud. But I say, anxiety - it's okay. You are allowed to keep me safe with "real and legit" stuff - but nope. You can't run the show. I felt a lot of anxiety this morning. I actually felt it throughout the day. I'm feeling it right now in my chest as I write this blog entry. So I'm going to take a deep breath, as I sit up straight. I tend to slump over when I'm nervous. I say to myself "You are doing a great job Rebecca. It's okay. You keep doing the work you are doing. I am healthy. I am safe. I am loved. I am here for me."
And I'm doing these podcasts too. Here's one.
When you are healing and working on making changes and improvements , it is OK to still feel stuff. It is OK to still feel emotions such as anxiety. Feelings, thoughts, emotions - they are going to come up. Guess what? I'm human. YOU are human. Just let's remind each other - let's hold hands and hearts (virtual of course) and let's check in on that self talk. Here is the podcast for today. I'm reaching out - got your hand. It's OK.
I'm putting the kind self talk to action. It's good to have it going 24/7. But I need to be ready when a moment gets a little bumpy. That's the time to pull out an extra dose of it.
Okay....so feel free to say them all with me. Of course, change the name to yours. And keep working on your inner superhero who is right there waiting to say these with you!
I took a walk while I was feeling nervous. I have been doing that more and more. Usually once I get out, it passes. But whoa! Hello panic attack brewing. Hadn't felt these intense feelings lately. Woosh! They were strong. They were the "get ready to run cause trouble is a brewing" feelings. I didn't run. I kept walking and I did this podcast. I haven't listened to it since I recorded it. I'll leave it as is...it is people talking raw style.
Well, even though I'm working on new loving self talk - life is going to keep on moving along. There will still be highs and lows. I still can't control everything. I'm still going to sort through emotions, thoughts and feelings. The plan? To continue with the "new" and "improved" practice of loving self talk.
Oh those tingly feelings. I'm working on book 2 but the nagging voices are bugging me a little. I haven't received a lot of feedback after giving away copies of the book for a week. I was really hoping for those. I'm very happy that I gave the book away. I just hoped that the feedback would come by now. So now I'm thinking maybe all those people who got the freebie didn't like the book. I don't know if that is true. I'm just worried because no one has written on Amazon if they liked it or not. So here I am writing book 2 and I'm doubting if it's worth it. Oh dear! Okay....take breaths. It's ok. I write to release. I write to connect. I write to let it out. So if one person gets the book, gets something from it, it's a success.
Wow, It was really hard taking that walk while I was feeling so anxious. But I did it. I did it. So here I am anxious about writing my second Mental Girl book - but step by step - I'll do it!
I'm realizing how important it is to take the time to practice self care. I'm referring to the outside stuff. Sure if you take pleasure in putting on makeup, nice clothes, and getting yourself all decked out - fabulous. Why not? But what about your insides? Do you take time to polish your insides? Love yourself? Take care of your heart? I'm finding out that I can accept my clothes being inside out, or going out without makeup. But to leave my insides unattended and in distress - well....Mental Girl says - start inside first. Feel good inside and wear that shirt inside and out and backwards.
While we are growing, healing, strengthening our brain muscles, and learning to practice self care we may find ourselves a little blue when the lows hit - or when the anxious thoughts come up. We may find ourselves surprised when those moments come when we are actually feeling better or feeling at ease. Mental Girl reminds me - it's ok. I am human. Human beings have emotions - all kinds of emotions and feelings. We also have all kinds of thoughts. The thoughts come in and Mental Girl reminds me I don't have to believe everything those thoughts tell me. I can allow them, accept them, and let them go. Yes, it's hard. Yes, it takes practice. But Mental Girl reminds me, inspires me, and encourages me that this self practice = self love.
I haven't been blogging as much with words as much as using these podcasts to express myself. I have been working on Mental Girl book 2. So more words will come. I just have been enjoying making these podcasts. They make me feel better, with the hope they make you feel better. They are quick. Instead of reading, you can listen to my quirky voice. :) I hope you enjoy them or get something from them. Thank you for your support.